Mother, I am training for an attack on an army camp.
Mother, I am training for an attack on an army camp.
I am writing this letter in a hurry during the time I have for lunch.
Last Tuesday …… The question that Velayutham uncle asked me when he saw me at the Ariyalai junction. Even now, it gives me an unwavering pain in my heart. “Child, did mother write a letter?” Velayutham uncle asks. I don’t understand anything. “Why would mother write a letter to me?” I ask with a feeling of incomprehensibility.
“Don’t you know, child? Your mother and brothers are in Canada with your father now. I was the one who took them to Colombo. I have just received a letter from there. I will write to them about what is happening in the village. That is what I asked…. Did your mother also write a letter to you?”
As he said this, my uncle looked at my face.
A thousand volcanoes erupted in my heart. I suppressed the anger and smiled at Velayutham uncle. Yes! I could not answer otherwise.
The tears that had gathered in my eyes behind the smile were wiped away by the hands of the responsible sister who touched my shoulder with support. I calmed down in a moment. I thought of my sisters and brothers. When I was lying in a hospital bed injured in the fighting, I thought of the parents of the nation who were trying to embrace me with love. When I was fighting in the salt flats of the Aanayiravu, where there was no water in the vast fields, I thought of our dear brothers who gave us food and water.
I am not an orphan…
I am not an orphan, I am a child of this nation.
Even now I cannot forget the words that Captain Usha said when she was going to attack the camp in Kokka. “We are the children of this land. Our life and death are in this land.”
Mother! She was injured in the fight in Kokka. A big wound on her forehead. In that last moment when her life was about to end, she kissed Mother Earth and made a mark on her forehead. Thanks to the sacrifices of thousands of sisters and brothers like her, every inch of our nation is being reclaimed.
Mother, I was born in this land of valor. I grew up in the camp of an incomparable leader full of valor and immense sacrifice. The footsteps of our comrades who have gone before us guide us.
Mother,
When you read this letter, sometimes your daughter, whom you gave birth to, will be lying in a grave in the embrace of the beloved country. But this country will stand together, carrying her feelings. How can I explain this spiritual relationship to you?
Although it is convenient… I have not even had time to tell you that you must protect your lives and live. I am writing this letter with the desire to tell you a few things even in this situation where you are standing in line for attack.
Tamileelam. This is our traditional land. If our right to live here is being denied by the Sri Lankan government, how long do you think foreign land will support us, mother.
All the countries that have given you shelter under the guise of “refugees” will support you for their own profits if you are there. When ‘humanity’ is at stake, you will fight for your rights. Then not only your rights but also your lives will be at stake. What are you going to do then? Are you going to destroy the history of Tamils with you?
Mother,
Even if you have become alienated from the relationship of mother, I cannot deny that I´m one of the sons of my country. You and others like you should understand this situation, mother.
When the history of our land is being written by blood, what is the use of you listening to the children in Ottawa?
The Sinhala government, which is single-minded in destroying the culture and identity of the Tamils, is bombing not only temples but also schools and hospitals. The streets of southern Tamileelam are so full of military brutality and the violence of traitorous gangs that it is impossible to walk.
It is during all this that our struggle is taking place today. Our national leader has cultivated that mental strength that breaks down any obstacles and fights. It is with this strength of mind that we have taught India a lesson. We are a lion’s dream for the Sri Lankan government.
This is our struggle for rights, mother!
This is the struggle we are waging for our survival, mother. I once told this to those who rushed in like you, saying, ‘Those who are unemployed and suffering may die, what will be our fate?’ mother.
Our struggle will continue until our borders are restored, until the tiger flag is raised on our land, and we stand up and dance. In this struggle, tomorrow I… my comrades will have become seeds for freedom on this land.
Then..
Even if you come to know about your daughter, my country will know more about your daughter.
The wind blowing there will whisper in your ears all the things you cannot understand.
Don’t hurt my feelings by kneeling and crying in front of my grave. There is only one thing I want from you.
Tomorrow, at the dawn of our nation’s independence, my land will be waiting to welcome you, my father, and my brothers.
This is what I told my siblings that this is our country.
Your daughter Andal.
– Erimalai
December 1992
(Translation by Tamilpriya)
Mother, I am training for an attack on an army camp.
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